Revelations

140205
Perhaps it was too much good coffee. Or it was weighing too much on my mind, I had learned far more than i ever thought i would know about this sordid affair. i knew i was unaware of a lot of things that happened in the platoon, but i had no idea exactly how much i did not know. What i learned tonight has effectively shattered my faith in the system. I had known for some time there was something drastically wrong in the school, what with the choice of SOMs for our batch. After hearing what i heard tonight, i feel , somehow, stained. All this malicious plotting and intrigue going on under the calm surface of a peaceful platoon was too much to believe.

I had always been an idealist. I always believed that hard work and perseverance would pay off. How can i help it? Its what i had been brought up on. The basic pillars of my moral foundation- Do what you think is right, treat others as you would want others to treat you, always do your best. The three sentences that form the core of my self-belief. If i was good enough, i would stand out and be reflected so. If i wasn't, well, I'll just be another cadet. Its good to be a bladerunner. Its worthy -I've always thought- to work for something that sets a standard and shows how good you are. Not that im saying that all who get it are evil bastards. I believed that SOH deserved his commendation. He earned all the respect and praise he got.

However , how much of this could be said of the other bladeholders?

CASE STUDY

Cadet MIKE is really worked up. He was assured a position as a military scholar if he gave up the chance for his other scholarship. Imagine his chagrin when he was not awarded the scholarship. So he felt really really sore. He swore to get back at Cpt CHARLIE for deceiving him, and decided to prove that he was worthy of the scholarship by standing out from his peers. But this developed into an obsession for him. He began to monitor the peer assessment rankings (secret) through underhand, devious, and above all, ILLEGAL methods. Not content with just being the top or near the top, he schemed to discredit and undermine his would-be competitors. Anyone who was too much in favour with his superiors, he would start spreading rumours and turning popular opinion against them. Thus he maintained lordship and dominion over his unknowing subjects, with the assistance of other unscrupulous cadets who were in cahoots with him. He would do anything to maintain his position in the platoon, even to the extent of suggesting to Cpt CHARLIE that perhaps some people do not really deserve to commission after all. Cpt CHARLIE listened, for cadet MIKE had always been his grapevine to the platoon's gossip, and saw through tinted lenses the life of the platoon.

Needless to say, when i first heard the stories, i was shocked beyond belief. I had never believed that this kind of Machiavellian intrigue and plotting could exist under such a smooth looking surface, much less in the premier institution that we train at. To me, being an officer was one of the highest honours, one that affirmed your ability, morality and ethics. To learn that people like this are not only commissioned but also exemplified as poster boys of our corps, it unplugs the cork at the bottom of a dwindling belief in the fairness of the system. Words cannot express the melange of anger, anguish and frustration i feel. That these kind of scum can meddle with the system, bend it to their own desire, and even try and deprive others of their fair chance to prove themselves, fills me with an anger that haunts my step, and dogs my waking moments. That furthermore, they are exemplified as the cream of the crop, makes me want to rip that bar off my shoulder and spit at the mockery of leadership they, through their actions, have twisted that bar to mean. Nine months of shit is not worth having to pay lip service to these kind of people as my betters. If you're good, you don't need to resort to this kind of underhand means to show your talent.


Footnote- After typing this out one and a half weeks after penning it down, i am surprised to see that the vehemence of my reaction is still as strong. So to those people who think that its their right to undermine a system for their own good, here's my two bits:
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EAT S**T AND DIE YOU MOTHERF**ERS!
MAY YOU BURN IN HELL FOR YOUR SINS!
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God give me the strength to be true to myself, my beliefs and my conviction. And please strike down these assholes with fire and brimstone. amen.